1 bajillion dollars = [x grains of rice] + [y ears of corn]

A few weeks ago, the Head Cheese of the firm gave a presentation to our office about all the typical things a head cheese would talk about - vision, strategy, how great we are, etc. The one thing I actually retained from that talk, though, had nothing at all to do with the firm. It was this fact nugget: not only is the United Arab Emirates obscenely wealthy (which I knew), but Abu Dhabi in particular has money just pouring out of its BUTT, to the tune of a WEEKLY surplus of many (several? at least several... obviously a number too big for me to even comprehend) billions of dollars. United States dollars.

In disposable cash.

A spare bajillion dollars.

Oh, the possibilities...

simple pleasures

A couple things:

• There's some stinky sh*t going on in my work life
• I've also been dealing with issues in my personal life

But!

• I'm rockin' a KICK. ASS. HAIRCUT. Granted, it wasn't so kick-ass two days ago, when my first attempt at styling resulted in a flat, floppy, lifeless pile on my head; nor was it so kick-ass yesterday, when my second attempt resulted in product OVERLOAD and a nasty sticky mess. Today, third time's the charm. This haircut is unlike any hairstyle I've ever had - it's short, and it's kicky, and it has way more personality than I do. It's something I've thought about doing for a long time, and only just now grew a pair and went for it. I love my hair guy!
• I am in such a cute outfit today. It includes a necklace my mom gave me which I love and which coordinates perfectly with what I'm wearing - and which means I actually ACCESSORIZED. My cute outfit is interesting! and sophisticated! and did I mention cute?? My typical clothing choices, while also cute (what can I say), are usually somewhat ordinary and "safe". I'll be completely honest, I kind of stumbled upon today's outfit accidentally, as it looks nothing like the image I had in my head when I started getting dressed. But that makes it even better, no? Yes.
• During my commute I jammed to some music I hadn't listened to in a long time. Music is awesome; it's amazing how just the right music at just the right time can turn my frown right upside down.
• I went running yesterday after work, AND ate very health-ily all day, which makes me feel good today. I'm trying to get back into the routine of exercising after a year and a half of sitting on my lazy ass, and have been jogging and riding my bike a couple (occasionally even a FEW!) times a week for the past month or so. I'm crossing my fingers this will last and I do this more often, despite the impending summer heat and humidity.

I will have a good day today, stinky issues be damned.

a little hairy

Confession (which will be news to no one that knows me at all): I have a bit of um, a type A personality. I like to know everything that's going to happen - how and when it's going to happen - all possible outcomes - before any of it happens. Hi, yes, control freak. *raises hand* Needless to say, I am not comfortable with change. I will never be the person that spontaneously decides, for example, to paint all the walls yellow, or make a major purchase, or change tampon brands.* Or CHOP OFF MY HAIR.

So why is it that every time I actually make an appointment for a haircut (ESPECIALLY the for the more major changes, like bangs, or a perm, or, if I haven't already mentioned, CHOPPING MY HAIR OFF), without fail, I have a great hair day? And pretty much every other day, my hair is flat, or it's frizzy, or the baby hairs are just *POOSH*, or… just, you know, general wonky-ness.

But I am determined to do this weekend what I've made an appointment to do, if for no other reason than to STOP OBSESSING ABOUT IT already (P: *raises hand in agreement*). But make no mistake, I will be pooping my pants about it from now until it happens.

Wish me luck.

* Although apparently, deciding more or less on a whim to go to law school, oh and also to pick up and MOVE TO JAPAN, I am ok with. Says the girl who likes soggy fries but the burnt crusts of hash browns. The same one who needs ice cold milk but room temperature water.

nuggets

Things that have amused me today:

1. Sign above a box of wooden coffee stirrers at work: "Please do not return used sticks!!!"
2. Woman in front of me on an escalator: diligently trying to clear a wedgie from her butt while talking on the phone
3. Laxatives display:

I can has... a poo?

~~~~~~~~~~

Is there anyone else out there that just cannot read a document on screen if it's zoomed to fit the screen? Is it just me that needs to have it at 100%, no more, no less? The only exception is if I'd have to scroll sideways to see the whole document at 100%; in those situations, it must be zoomed to fit the screen.

~~~~~~~~~~

Now I'm going to tell you the story of how I was almost unable to board my flight back to Tokyo from San Francisco. After I passed through security, I spied a Coach store and went in to see if they had a purse that my friend was looking for (duty free! but they did not). A few days prior, the same friend had mentioned that Coach sunglasses fit well on small Asian nose bridges (they do!); so of course I had to see for myself. I put my passport and boarding pass down so that I could concentrate on trying on sunglasses and marvelling at how stunning I looked in them (and, I gotta be honest here, I totally did).

And then I moseyed (mosied?) dilly-dallied around the rest of the concourse, remembering my VIP(apers) - but not where I had seen them last - only when it came time to get to the gate. Which is when I rushed in a panic back to security and got a guy to help me look, which of course turned up nothing - a conclusion I came to on my own, since the guy just kind of wandered off at some point without telilng me that he had decided to stop helping me. I finally went back to ask at the Coach store even though I KNEW I would not have been so silly as to have left them there. Right... me and my silly self would have been in a silly mess had a store employee not taken the documents to my gate. Thank you, hallelujah! Made it to the gate just in time to be one of those annoying stragglers quickly ushered in (with the friendly advice to "Be careful next time, put it in your bag now") by the gate attendant.

So there you have it. Ginko biloba: must look into.

tamami: m.i.a. (abridged)

Um, oops. Guess I managed to skip an entire month here. How you guys managed to go on this long without me, I don't know - but here is the story of why you've had to do so.

First, I managed to attract a stomach virus. Then, I went to Thailand for a week. Next, I was lazy and uninspired. After that, I went home for a week and a half (Target! and Trader Joe's! and did I mention Target? OH.MY.). And now, here I am.

The End.

More to come about my trip home, but not today, because I'm busy being lazy and uninspired.